Since I hit Lifetime last week, I only need to weigh in once a month so I didn’t have a weigh-in this morning. HOWEVER, I think this is a bad thing for me. I need the accountability of facing the scale each week. If I know I don’t have a weigh-in, I notice I let myself slide more than usual and we do NOT want that happening since I need to stay in the 153-157 range to still be considered Lifetime … and to become a Leader.
As I cheated and slacked all weekend on my eating (and somehow rationalized it to myself), I realized that I need to get back to attending weekly Weight Watchers meetings as a member. I have always found the meetings as a “me” time. I don’t take a lot of time for myself – especially with my old job I just didn’t have extra time – but I love devoting about 30-45 minutes a week to improving myself. Plus, while working, I catch bits and pieces of a meeting, but I don’t get the added benefits of bouncing ideas around with other members.
Once I decided I had to get back to meetings – my last was January 17 in Chicago – I had to figure out a time and place. Thankfully with my schedule, I have more flexibility with choosing a meeting. I love my Tuesday 8am weigh-in and thankfully the Boston WW location is open for drop-in hours during that time so I can knock my weigh-in out then and attend a meeting whenever/wherever I want.
The other big decision to make was whether to attend the meeting of someone I know or to a complete stranger. I decided to go to a complete stranger so I could just feel like a member. Also, I wouldn’t have to share that I was a WW employee unless I wanted to.
So after chatting with Elaine (my boss/Territory Manager), I decided to attend the Tuesday 10am meeting in Malden with Heather.
It was GREAT. It wasn’t the normal WW crowd I am used to from Chicago or the Cubs, but the people were amazing. It was nice to sit back and really take in what Heather and the other members were saying. I also got to participate without anyone knowing who I was. I even got to finally celebrate hitting Lifetime in a meeting setting. That was fun and exactly what I imagined way back when when I started WW.
I was feeling so good after that nice 45 minute session of “me” time I hit up Costco and bought myself some beautiful roses … and they were only $16! You know me – I like a good deal.
What do you have to share on this Truth Tuesday? Did you face the scale?
Why would I ever leave my comfort zone?
It’s all warm … fuzzy … safe … familiar … secure … comfortable … constraining … impairing …
There have been three big times in my life that I have taken the plunge out of my zone:
The first was 2007…
For too long, I remained in my comfortable bubble of Boston. I went to high school, college and then grad school in the Boston area. I didn’t leave Massachusetts until 2007 when I was 24 to move cross country to San Francisco. Talk about a change…
In 2007, I switched jobs (from tickets to PR) and left my hometown team of the Boston Red Sox to join the San Francisco Giants. I left my high school and college friends on the Right Coast to join the Left Coast where I only knew my uncle and his family.
I fell in love with San Francisco as soon as I got there … and I was lucky enough to find a great group of friends right off the bat. This made the transition a lot easier.
I learned in that move that I could be independent … and survive. I could move away from what was familiar with me and thrive. I wouldn’t trade my time in San Francisco for anything.
The second was 2008…
I lived in San Francisco for just 10 months before returning to Boston for my second stint with the Red Sox. I ended up being back in Boston for about three months before I was offered a job with the Cubs … and off to Chicago I went in January 2008. Now the biggest difference in moving to Chicago was that I didn’t really know anyone. I had two people I knew there, but other than that I was finally moving to a place where I didn’t have any family to fall back on. Also, I never thought I would live in the Midwest.
Again, I was lucky enough to find a core group of friends within a week of moving (thanks to a coworker who opened his crew to me). Finding a group of people to turn to while in an unfamiliar place makes any transition easier.
The third and most important instance was joining Weight Watchers.
I remember walking in to the first WW meeting and being scared to the core. I was going in to a new experience all by myself. I had no one with me. I was facing this big change with me. But, it is the biggest – scariest – and best decision of my life because through weight watchers I have taken my comfort zone and broken all of the walls that surrounded it. Okay, I didn’t break them – I blew them up so bad they can never be repaired.
Through my first two “out of comfort zone” moves, I always had a voice in the back of my mind telling me it was a bad decision. That little voice telling me these people didn’t really want to be my friends. The little freakin’ voice in the back of my mind telling me I wasn’t good enough to enjoy my successes. That little person sitting behind my brain telling me I should just run back to the familiar … to head back to Boston because I wouldn’t thrive. I wouldn’t succeed in what I was doing.
But, then Weight Watchers stepped in to the picture. The little voice was there at the beginning. Telling me I wouldn’t succeed – saying there was no way I could lose that much weight – telling me to just give up.
But, the pounds started coming off and the little voice in my head started getting smaller and softer. I will not lie to you, he is still lurking in my brain today, but the voice has turned into a squeak. It is so soft I can just poof it away…
(Note: I want to be completely honest that losing weight has not solved all of my problems. I still have a lot of issues to work through, but confidence has risen partially because of my weight loss – not solely because of.)
Since joining Weight Watchers, I have eaten foods I never imagined I would try – and even like … I have found the confidence to start Spinning classes … I have rekindled my love of running … I have worn a bathing suit in public in Hawaii … I have embraced social media and share my journey with so many through Twitter and Facebook … I have opened my heart, mind and soul to all of you through this blog … But, what is the most uncharacteristic thing I have done so far? I have started to accept and even love myself – imperfections at all.
There are times I wish I could go back and show the young unhappy teenage me what I have become with a couple leaps of Faith, hard work and determination! To show the girl that wanted to just disappear that I am loud, proud and happy to be alive. To show the girl that wanted to end it all a couple times that not doing it has paid off and I have been able to share so much with the world … and more to come.
How will you push the boundaries of your comfort zone today? This week? This month? This year?
Even though I have been Molly’s step mom since the wife and I got together three years ago and we adopted Laney about a year and a half ago, I didn’t truly have my first “gutwrenching parent” moment until Wednesday. (Note: I was distraught when we left the pups while we went to Hawaii for a week in November, but I knew they were in good hands with the wife’s parents/local puppy camp they had been going to for years)
For a few weeks, Laney has had a couple gashes in her big floppy dog years. We think they started while either roughhousing with Mols or shaking her head and the ears hitting her collar. Either way, they had been there, but were scabbed over and didn’t look to be really be hurting her. Then that changed about a week or so ago.
Lanes would shake her head and then came the blood. I originally thought the scabs opened because of the cold weather in Boston and she was playing around so much outside now that the pups have a backyard at their disposal 24-7. We tried repairing the ear with a “new-skin” type product made for dogs.
Finally on Monday I made an appointment with a local vet who my friend trusts treating her three cats. The nurse let me know that she would need to fast before the visit in case they need to immediately go in for surgery. This led to a lot of ice cubes Tuesday night to make her think she was getting a treat.
So I took her up to the vet at Central Animal Hospital in Stoneham, Mass at 9am. We went in and the vet let me know she would have to go in to surgery. I had tried to prep myself, but I lost it as soon as I got back in to the car. I think having to hand her off to a group I had just met 15 minutes prior was what really set off the waterworks. Plus, she hadn’t been put under since we had gotten her so I was just hoping she would make it through.
Thankfully the vet kept me in the loop all afternoon and she pulled through with flying colors. I was at work so my parents were able to pick her up at 5:30 that night. I was glad she didn’t have to stay overnight since they didn’t have a crew at the office during the night and I didn’t want her to be alone.
My parents brought her home and promptly texted me this sad and pathetic little pic:
Apparently she was loopy from surgery and disoriented with the cone that she kept walking in to walls and had to be carried up the stairs because she couldn’t navigate the stairs on her own. Once I knew she was fine, I was able to laugh at how she was acting.
(Have you all seen the movie Up? It is from that movie that I got the term “cone of shame.” In case anyone was wondering why I have been constantly calling it that. )
Since I felt so bad about the surgery, I let her sleep with us in bed that night. Let me tell you I woke up with “cone” marks around my face/neck as she kept trying to snuggle in to my armpit/neck where she usually likes to sleep.
We all had to go to work on Thursday so the wife fed her, took her out and put her in the crate for the day. Since I wasn’t going to make it home til 2pm, I had my dad check on her at 11:30am. She seemed in good spirits, but as he ate his lunch. He noticed that she managed to somehow get her ears out of the protective bandages and was promptly spraying blood everywhere. I describe the kitchen as looking like a scene out of Law & Order: SVU.
So I once I got home from work I headed back to the vet (with the check engine light now on on my car) and picked up the patient … again. This time she had a much bigger bandage on her head, as well as a bigger cone. They also gave me some sedatives to give her this weekend to keep her from really roughhousing so the ears can heal.
Needless to say today I have been on patient duty and it has been a lot of lying around. She seems to be okay and I am just hoping that canceling my plans for the weekend will pay off and she will recover quickly.
But for now we are taking it easy and returning for a follow up with the vet on Monday at 3pm.
Thank you all so much for your kind words of support and encouragement on Twitter and Facebook over the past couple days. I know in the end it ended up being a very mild surgery, but in the moment it seemed like the biggest surgery you could imagine. I have no idea how I will one day handle having kids if this is how I am with my little pups.
These babies changed my life on Tuesday morning … I can never Spin without them again.
This just makes me laugh every time I look at it…
My little love bugs! I dropped Laney (left) off this morning to have surgery so please keep her in your thoughts…
After I weighed in last week, all I could think about was hitting Lifetime today. I knew I had to be focused and stay on plan. I did that … until Friday. Friday night I had plans to go out with friends and did my prep work. I looked at the restaurant’s menu (Wagamama) and did the best I could to decipher the points since they don’t have their nutrition facts on the site. I picked a good sesame chicken salad and some edamame. I figured it would be filling and yummy. I felt confident when I left the house on Friday and then…
… the entire plan went out the window!
The wife and I got to the restaurant early so we had a couple beers then I checked in to the bar on Foursquare and they offered us a half-priced appetizer. Yup! I fell for it hook line and sinker! So we split an app … then since I had a couple beers what were a few more. Needless to say that night was not one of my finest eating moments.
Not sure this happens to other people, but once I have a bad night - the whole next day turns in to a disaster.
So Friday and Saturday were horrible. All I kept thinking was I was putting myself in the wrong direction from Lifetime. So Sunday morning I got back on track and hit the gym for an awesome Spin class with Linds and Jen. Sunday night I still went a tad over points because my wife brought this garlic ciabatta bread in to the house to have with our spaghetti squash. But, overall I called Sunday a win in my book since I worked out and got all my healthy checks in.
Monday was right on point – I worked out, hit all WW Healthy Guidelines and stuck to 26 pts.
So that brings us to this morning. I got on the scale before heading to Spin and did NOT like what I saw. I saw a number that would put me out of reach of Lifetime. I made sure to give 150% during Spin and thankfully my friend Jess (the instructor) delivered with an awesome class. I got home and did my usual home weigh-in before the actual WW weigh-in. Well I saw a better number after Spin, but still not one that I liked.
But, you all know when I weigh in so there was no way I could skip out. I just had to face the music. My wife came with me for moral support and to act as photog if I hit Lifetime. I stepped on the scale and … I took a deep breathe and prayed to see a number between 153-157 …
I gained 0.6 lbs. That’s it. Phew! That put me at 155.4 lbs – just 0.4 lbs over my goal weight – and in perfect position for LIFETIME!!
Today: Gain 0.6
Starting Weight: 217.4
Today’s Weight: 155.4
Total Lost: 62.0
OMG! OMG! I did it. I honest and truly made it to the moment I dreamed about on November 2, 2009. The moment I thought would never be in my realm of possibility on that first night of Weight Watchers. But, you know what? I did do it. I stuck with it.
I MADE IT HAPPEN!
I love this smile and am happy it hasn’t left my face yet today…
I told my Territory Manager Elaine that I wanted to create my own “Biggest Loser Finale” type moment when I hit Lifetime status. Thankfully she approved and that is how the above happened. I am wicked happy that I decided to go this route and bring my own confetti to the weigh-in.
Lifetime means more to me than hitting Goal. I proved to myself that I could maintain a weight within my goal weight for six weeks – even with a 1,000 mile move, career change and basically a complete change in my life.
This morning really made me think back to this journey and how I don’t even recognize the person I was when I first stepped in to my Weight Watchers meeting on November 2, 2009. I was a sad – lonely – unhappy – and scared person. I was able to put on quite a front to the outside world, but inside was a whole different person.
But now? Now I see the good. I see the happiness in life. I am proud of the person I have become. I am happy with the person I am now. I have shown myself – and others – that I can accomplish anything I put my mind to. I am stronger than I thought I was. I am a fighter. I am a success story.
Today, I am living in the moment and enjoying all of my accomplishments. But, what will come tomorrow? Tomorrow I will continue to keep my eye on the new prize … maintaining! Now that I have reached this milestone, I vow not to return to old habits. For me, this time – the weight loss will stick. There is no going back.
Thankfully, I have one incredible support system – in person, through social media and within my new Weight Watchers work family – that will continue to motivate and push me towards success.
I may falter. I may fall off the healthy lifestyle/Weight Watchers wagon at times … but thankfully every one of you will be there to pick me back up and put me back on track. And for that, I thank you all. You have all touched my journey in a positive light and for that I am eternally grateful.
I am reminding myself today – and every day – that I am human. I am not perfect. But, picking myself up and never looking back, will allow me to keep succeeding.
So today, I relish in my accomplishment. I will allow myself to flood in the compliments and love being thrown at me from all directions. I am bottling it all up to keep with me on the dark days. I am saying to myself…
When I started my weight loss journey in November 2009, I honestly thought the only thing that mattered would be the number on the scale.
… Was I wrong.
In the beginning, sure. I focused just on what the scale was saying and that is how I judged my mood for the week. Being completely honest, I had a breakdown when I had my first gain. It was only 1.2 lbs, but up til that point I had lost each week. It was at that point, I had to re-evaluate my priorities.
I was doing Weight Watchers to create a healthier lifestyle for myself. I didn’t want to be the unhappy person I was inside anymore. I was working through the program for more than dropping the pounds.
As the scale fluctuated with life (especially in 2010 when I was much more lax with my tracking/commitment/etc) and I got frustrated with that, I looked to other things that were still plusses and positives to look for to help me continue on.
I think I can actually remember the Non-Scale Victories (NSV) more than the weight milestones.
Some of my favorite non-scale victories in the last two-plus years:
1) Getting outside of my comfort zone and trying classes at the gym that I wouldn’t normally have tried on my own: Spinning, Zumba, Hip Hop, Yoga, Pilates, etc.
2) Being able to buy pants in a decreasing order! I started wearing a size 18 and I just bought a pair of size 8 pants two weeks ago. I remember how excited I was when I got back into a size 12 – that felt amazing – so you can only imagine how the size 10 then size 8 pants experience felt.
3) I was able to wear a dress in Hawaii without having to squeeze into a pair of Spanx! I hadn’t worn a dress without Spanx in years…
4) Being able to fit into clothes at the Lululemon Athletica clothing. It was a goal of mine for so long so the first time it actually happened … I cried! And now I’m not even the biggest size in the store anymore.
5) Sitting on a plane or train and not spilling over into the seat next to mine. I can sit in those seats now and have room to spare.
6) I don’t hide from the camera like I used to. Prior to WW, I would hide behind other people in photos – turn to the side – or hide behind my friends so only my head would show. If I was sitting on a couch, I would make sure to strategically place a pillow in my lap to cover my stomach.
7) Learning to complete and enjoy filling the WW Healthy Guidelines on a daily basis. Now my body craves fruits and veggies…
8) I am more confident in my running. I have worked hard and it is paying off. I am posting times and splits I never through imaginable. I signed up for another marathon (first was in September 2006) and I never thought I would do that again.
9) CONFIDENCE! I was never a very confident person unless at work. I always felt a sense of myself and confidence when in “work mode,” but outside of work, I was much more timid and shy. But now, I know I am stronger and worth more than I used to give myself credit for.
…and one of the biggest NSV of them all?
10) I like myself now. I don’t love everything about myself since I think there is always room for improvement. But, my old feelings of wanting to “hurt myself” or the “this world would be better without me” thoughts, have completely gone away. (More on this topic next week)
So please, when you see a standstill on the scale, don’t give up. Think of how this journey has impacted the rest of your life. Think of how positively your changes have not only affected you, but the people around you.
What is your favorite NSV?
1) I took a fitness evaluation at my gym (Boston Sports Club) with my cousin’s trainer Jacqui. And guess what folks? I am NOT as weak as I thought I was. YAY!! She also made me weigh-in. Let me tell you that freaked me out. Sorry, I weigh in on Tuesday morning at 8am at Weight Watchers – not on Thursday night after a full day of food. But I was less than 2 lbs heavier than my Tuesday AM weigh-in, which means I am right on track. So yay I survived my pop weigh-in.
We sat down and went over my history and what I was looking to get out of the eval. Let me tell you, I sound injury prone when I go through my medical history: broken foot, sprained ankles, patella injury, IT band injury, back surgery, sprained neck, etc. I sound a lot older than 29.
Prior to the eval, I had enjoyed a nice easy 30 min on the elliptical and my 3 60 second straightarmed planks for my #plankaday program. Then she had me do a 90 second plank. Sure why not? Yup, that made a total of 4 and a half minutes of planks. Works for me!
I told Jacqui that I obviously tackled my weight loss and got the cardio under control, but I really need to work on weight lifting and toning. I told her some of the exercises that Mel gave me before I left Chicago and she showed me some new ones I can incorporate in.
Thankfully she let me know at the end of the eval that I am in fact not as weak as I think I am. Score! My body fat is actually in the “fitness” range, which is great. Who woulda thought? Me in the fitness range. Heck yeah – that is a pretty sweet Non-Scale Victory.
(Tomorrow’s post will be about Non-Scale Victories)
2) I have decided on trying a new concept: breaking out of my comfort zone at least once a week. Last week I actually had two instances of breaking out of my safe zone. 1) I bought the Lululemon shirt that shows skin and 2) I tried spinach and quinoa (actually second time on quinoa, but I still count it). I stepped out of the box and lived to tell the tale … I actually even enjoyed the spinach and quinoa.
What will I do this week? We are going to make spaghetti squash on Saturday night. I am really looking forward to this one since we have bought spaghetti squash twice before, but let it go bad before we actually got around to making it. That WON’T happen this time.
(Monday’s post will be about Breaking Out Of My Comfort Zone)
3) I am proud of myself. A lot of the time I get caught up with what is going on in life that I don’t give myself as much credit as I deserve. But, now that I have more time to think and put myself first, I am realizing that I am pretty awesome. Well, you all knew that already! I kid, I kid.
I think I need to take more time to take inventory on how far I have come. How hard I have worked. How much I have accomplished.
So today, I am. I am kinda freakin’ amazed with myself. For this – I am giving myself a *Bravo*!
I did something this week that I don’t think I have done since I started Weight Watchers way back in November 2009 … I didn’t step on my home scale once during the week before a weigh in. I have certainly gone a week without checking the home scale, but I wasn’t weighing in that following week. Does that make sense?
So I went in to this morning’s weigh-in completely in the dark of what to expect. This week I decided to try 30 points plus a day. While in Maintenance is the time to play around with how many points you can eat a day to maintain a constant weight for the future.
This week I also got lax on tracking on Saturday and Sunday. I made sure to write everything down, but I didn’t figure out the points value for everything I ate.
Well, I braved the scale this morning for Week Five of Maintenance and … I gained 0.8 lbs. Boo! But, the victory is that I was still 0.2 lbs UNDER my goal weight so YAY for that!! Every weigh-in needs a silver lining … and that was mine!
Today: Gain 0.8
Starting Weight: 217.4
Today’s Weight: 154.8
Total Lost: 62.6
Well, this was a good experiment. It looks as if 30 points per day may be too many for me to have to maintain a constant weight. So this week I am going to try 28 points a day and see what happens there. The lowest points I should have according to Weight Watchers is 26 and 30 was too many so let’s give a number right in the middle a go: 28 it is!
Last week, I also took some time away from the gym to help my IT band/patella injury heal, which may have also played a part in the gain.
Overall, I am still happy to be under my goal weight during Week Five of Maintenance. I want to stay focused and hopefully see the 0.8 lbs come off this week. Since I hit goal on January 10 at 153.8 and today I weighed in at 154.8 – let’s get rid of that pesky pound gain if I can.
I am proud to say that yesterday marked the 14th-straight day that I have hit all of my Weight Watchers Healthy Checks, hit my 100oz of water, did my #plankaday and tracked/wrote down everything I had to eat or drink. THAT is a pretty sweet NSV (Non-Scale Victory).
If all goes according to plan and I weigh in between 153 and 157 on Tuesday, February 21 – I will hit Lifetime! Now this will be a time to celebrate!! I am actually going to head to a party store this weekend to try and get some confetti to throw up in the air when I do it. I want a sort of Biggest Loser Finale feeling if I can. Obviously not that much since I can’t afford a confetti cannon AND it would take me forever to clean up the WW center, but just enough to get that feeling!!
I wish I had a regular meeting I was attending so I could do a big celebration with other members, but since that isn’t in the cards right now – I will make my own celebration.
Do you have any Truth Tuesday celebrations or frustrations?
I cannot believe we got to Boston two weeks ago today. Time flies, doesn’t it? How it is February 13th already is beyond me.
I can tell you the last two weeks have been the least stressful two weeks of my life in about 10 years … and I am kind of really liking it.
I am having an awesome time working for Weight Watchers and feeling comfortable working on the “other” side of the scale. It has been great to meet so many new faces, but I still need to work on finding my own meeting to attend. I have been listening to some great Leaders, while working, but it isn’t quite the same as sitting in the meeting as a member. I had such amazing leaders in Chicago that I will have to test a few meetings out here to try and find someone at the same level as the women I have had before.
It has been so nice getting back in touch with friends that I haven’t seen in years. I have kept in touch with many on a daily basis through gchat, text, Facebook, Twitter and phone dates … but nothing beats a face-to-face hangout. Ya know?
My wife and I met up with about eight people on Saturday night at a great bar in Kenmore Square near Fenway and it was a great time. On the ride home, I thought about how every one of those people is active in some way shape or form – either running, Spinning, gym rat or a Rugby player. I love it. They are all people taking an active approach to Life and I am happy to surround myself with their energy. Plus, I made dates to hangout with all of them in a place that didn’t have to involve food or booze … okay, after that night.
Thankfully, my wife has gotten her first week of work under her belt and I think that is helping her feel more settled. I think a set routine can help anyone get their bearings. In addition, she has found a couple hockey teams to play for, as well as a few comic book shops she can frequent. Comics/toys and hockey is pretty much all my wife needs to be happy.
(Note: I owe my wife a debt of gratitude each day for uprooting her life and moving 1,000 miles to a place where she doesn’t know too many people to help make me happy. I hope that she learns to love and be comfortable in Boston as much as I do/am.)
It may only be 14 days in, but I think this decision will pay off for the best. It will be a long six months while we stay with my parents and all of our stuff in storage. But the sacrifice now will pay off in the end. Now we can save up some money and pick the perfect neighborhood for us to set up shop.
We are hoping to move out in September and rent for a year before buying a place and really setting up roots. (Doesn’t that sound so adult? )
So my fine friends … sometimes you just need to follow your heart … look at me … my heart hasn’t been this happy in a long time!