This is one of the blog topic I have been really dreading, but keep getting nudged by a certain someone to finally do it.  (There you go Linds here is your second mention in the blog :P) One thing I have always been horrible with is positive thoughts about me. I am the queen of self-deprecating humor. I mean if I call myself a “fat a$$” first then someone else won’t do it. Right? Well, that is some of the logic that goes on in my head.

I think when you are trying to mask insecurities for so long (especially when your main issue is weight); you get really good at using humor to cover up the pain.

I have always been better at pointing out my own flaws than complimenting myself. I am a perfectionist that hates to fail. I know I know I am not the only person on the planet that feels that way. But I digress…

For me, it is just easier to point out my imperfections than to see the good. I am really good at taking a compliment from someone and spitting a negative right back. My wife can definitely attest to this. It seems like there is something in my brain that blocks the compliment. I mean I hear it, but it kind of goes in one ear and out the other. I like compliments, but for someone reason my brain will only validate them if they are say about my work, work ethic or something not too personal. Does that make sense?

Weight Watchers always preaches that in order for this program to work, you need to think positively. And I honestly try. I have used all the tricks people have suggested.

* Don’t say something to yourself you would want someone to say to one of your friends.

* Tell yourself three positive things about yourself every day.

* Every time you think a negative thought. Stop. Recognize It. Reverse it.

But none of those things work.

I am always the first to tell friends to “stop beating themselves up” when something doesn’t work out or “stop saying you are fat” when they make a comment about their own body. But, I can never accept my own advice. I would love to, but I just don’t know what it would take to change.

I am jealous of the people out there that just love everything about themselves. It seems like a great feeling/place to be.

Anyone feel the same way? Have any other suggestions I could try?